Motherhood and Creativity Interview #15 - Heather Waugh
Heather is a mum of two young kids and her Substack, Beat the Stream, covers topics on the harsh and beautiful realities of parenting balanced with self-identity and growth.
Welcome to Motherhood and Creativity, an interview series where I share the words of creative mums who inspire me here on Substack and beyond.
I share words of joy, strength, creativity and community in motherhood.
I feel like when we read the words of mums who speak so honestly about motherhood - the good parts, the hard parts and everything in between - this can really help give us some comfort and feel less alone.
I find so much inspiration from reading about mums who are all weaving their work and creativity around their kids too, as this is the situation I’m currently in. Knowing that there are other mums out there with creative dreams and careers and they are making it work around the edges of motherhood, that is so encouraging.
I hope you enjoy reading the words from these wonderful mums over the next few months, and that you find comfort and inspiration in their words too.
You can read all 14 of the previous Motherhood and Creativity interviews here.
Motherhood and Creativity Interview #15 - Heather Waugh
Heather has a bachelor's in English Literature and Creative Writing from the University of Missouri - Columbia. While her day job is all about retail content strategy, her passion is writing fiction. Outside of work and writing, she is partnering with her husband to chase their two young kids and two senior dogs around.
Heather maintains a Substack newsletter called Beat the Stream that covers topics on the harsh and beautiful realities of parenting balanced with self-identity and growth (and perhaps an occasional post about the Kansas City Chiefs, as a lifelong fan of the team).
How old are your kids?
6 and 2.
When your children are older, what do you hope that they remember about the kind of mum that you were?
A mother who was always there for them, who sacrificed while also modeling self-care and constructive relationships. A mom they can come to about anything and trust with difficult topics.
Essentially I hope they remember me as someone supportive and present whose behavior is the groundwork for who they can become on their own.
When you think about the tough parts of your motherhood journey, which of your qualities/strengths have got you through these tough times?
The forgiveness and love that shines out of little kids as I tried to figure out parenting. Also the support of my partner and my family in all my decisions.
What brings you joy in motherhood?
Little kid laughter, new development milestones, seeing their minds start to shape with ideas, and watching as they present their own skillsets and favoritism.
How important is creativity to you?
I have been imaginative since childhood and I developed that imagination into writing at a young age. Creativity was something I tried to monetize in early adulthood, thinking my love for creativity also needed to be my sole income. This caused burnout and de-prioritization in order to find something more secure to support my future idea of my family.
I took an unintentional 10 year sabbatical from creativity to hustle a career, but on that journey I found creativity presents itself in so many other ways besides my passion of fiction writing.
I found creativity in house projects, in child development, in kid art projects, in planning activities, and even in corners of my corporate job where I could take advantage of the creative part of my brain.
Now that I am writing consistently again, I forgot how good for the soul creativity can be.
Tell us more about your favourite ways to be creative.
Fiction writing is my passion. To create characters going through turmoil and seeing how they persevere through life despite their own internal blocks helps me work out my own challenges or challenges I see in others.
But I have developed my writing skill to so many outlets, like my Substack newsletter
where I try to share my parenting and PPD experiences to help others, or in my career to create training and engaging content that supports end users.I haven't had much energy for this with two small kids and clawing my way through PPD, but I used to love to find creativity from a kid perspective with art projects, science experiments, and fun activities.
Since becoming a mum, have you experienced a creative surge? What did that look like for you?
I had buried my creativity thinking because I needed to pour myself into my kids. Especially my first when I was working full time out of the office with a daily two hour commute. I felt I was missing so much of her life so I put every second I had into enjoying her, putting myself in poor health and letting relationships languish.
Then the pandemic happened and I spent most of my time working above and beyond to avoid a layoff and worrying about everyone as variants surged. Then I had my second kid and suffered major PPD that included physical paralysis.
In those endless dark days, creativity found me again. I had these shining moments of clarity about how fleeting life was and what I had wasted so far. My heart was drawn back into the idea of writing again despite the numerous times I had shut it in a box deep inside myself for 10 years, no matter how loudly that box rattled.
The novel I am currently working on came screaming into my conscious in the midst of this darkness, throwing me a rope to climb out of the pit. Starting my Substack newsletter was me testing the waters. Can I even write again? Do I remember how to do this?
But now the floodgates are open and I can't believe I supressed it for so long. I already see how it is a positive influence on my six year old as we have creative hour during my two year old's nap time.
What does honouring your creativity look like for you in this season of your mothering?
I am still trying to figure it out! It is so tough while working full time, especially from home when my kids see me on a computer all day then I try to get on it more "after hours".
I have been reserving Saturday mornings during my oldest's jiujitsu class to write while dad takes her, but with summer travel it has been a huge challenge trying to make time for it.
What’s been your experience of finding a community in motherhood?
It has been difficult.
For a motherhood community, there are so many people who are quick to judge if you don't parent like them. I stick to a couple of close friends who have kids where we can agree on some basic parenting tenements. I sometimes chat with coworkers about it, but that can dive quickly into judgement if you express too much that someone doesn't agree with.
For a creative community, I don't have much of one and it is challenging. I work for a creative company and have made some connections with writers, but they are very casual.
What words of encouragement would you offer to a mum who might be struggling at the moment?
Every. Body. Struggles. I know that is so hard to believe when you’re exhausted and your overstimulated brain doom-scrolls on Instagram and everyone seems to have shiny, perfect lives. But literally every single parent is fighting a battle and is full of doubt and self-criticism. You are not alone, you are doing so much better than you think. And the most important part - your kids think you are doing great because they don't know any different.
You can find out more about here:
Heather’s Substack -
Twitter/X - @HW_Writing
Thank you for your wonderful words Heather.
I enjoyed so many parts of this interview and found it interesting when Heather talked about:
her journey from being a creative child, trying to monetize her creativity and feeling burnout from that. Then a 10 year break from creativity helped Heather see that creativity comes in so many different ways. Heather says that:
“Now that I am writing consistently again, I forgot how good for the soul creativity can be.”
how Heather’s favourite way of being creative is fiction writing. I’d never thought about this part of it, but I love that the characters Heather writes about helps her with her own challenges:
“To create characters going through turmoil and seeing how they persevere through life despite their own internal blocks helps me work out my own challenges or challenges I see in others.”
how Heather buried her creativity because she thought she had to pour all of her energy into her kids, but how that also led to PPD. Then how creativity found Heather in those dark days, and how this led to her starting to write again. I really relate to Heather’s story as I also buried most parts of myself with my first child especially, and it led to PNA. Creativity also found me in my recovery and it’s led to a whole new life and change of career for me. I think both of our stories show that something beautiful can be created from our struggles.
how hard it can be to find a community of like-minded mums, who you don’t feel judged by. If we feel like others are judging us, then it leads us to open up less and just shrink away, which is not what mums need - we need to feel able to open up and share our stories without judgement.
and finally, Heather’s compassionate advice to other mums:
“Every. Body. Struggles. I know that is so hard to believe when you’re exhausted and your overstimulated brain doom-scrolls on Instagram and everyone seems to have shiny, perfect lives. But literally every single parent is fighting a battle and is full of doubt and self-criticism. You are not alone, you are doing so much better than you think. And the most important part - your kids think you are doing great because they don't know any different.”
I hope you enjoyed this interview in the ‘Motherhood and Creativity’ series - I publish these interviews every fortnight, and will continue to for as long as the interviews keep coming through.
You can read all 14 of the previous Motherhood and Creativity interviews here.
Let me know in the comments, which of Heather’s words resonated with you.
Ways to work with me this Autumn:
Introducing 🍂The Autumn Sanctuary 🍂
The Autumn Sanctuary is 4 weeks of cosy weekly online gathering circles for mums, via Zoom. We’ll start on Sat 2nd November and they’ll run until Sat 23rd November.
Each 90 minute cosy gathering circle is a space for you to reflect, dream and connect all whilst sinking into the seasonal energy of Autumn.
Designed especially with Autumn in mind, each gathering circle will be a blend of group coaching, journalling, seasonal meditations, mindfulness and self-compassion exercises.
We are going to harness the seasonal energy of Autumn and focus on these different themes each week:
letting go of what no longer serves you
bringing more balance into your life
what you are grateful for this year &
celebrating your achievements of 2024
The Autumn Sanctuary is going to support you in:
having some dedicated time and space out for yourself
being kinder to yourself as you learn how seasonal energy impacts your own energy levels
finding clarity on your thoughts and feelings from journalling and sharing your story
feeling grounded and soothed as you listen to the seasonal meditations I’ve designed especially for mums
feeling energised and uplifted by the collective healing energy of a like-minded group of mums
finding a small community of like-minded mums and feeling inspired and comforted by them sharing their similar experiences to you
I’d love for you to join us!
I’ve got space for 12 mums and we start on Sat 2nd November.
You can find all the info here.
You might also like some of my most recent posts:
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Thank you both for this interview. I am so happy to hear that creativity led Heather back to herself and her health. It’s so difficult to describe how important it is as an outlet and way inward in the all-consuming days of mothering xx