A sacred pause in midsummer

Let's talk about how far you've come as a mum

Photo by Simon Berger on Unsplash

It’s midsummer season

Last night I was reading ‘Sacred Seasons’ by Kirsty Gallagher, and she talks about this time from 23rd July- 22nd August as the Midsummer Season - a sacred season of abundance, where:

“Nature has moved from growth to ripening and is now giving generously of her gifts for all to enjoy. This is the time for you and Nature to appreciate all that you have grown, brought to life and manifested over the last few months.”

Kirsty Gallagher

Kirsty suggests that to honour the midsummer, we could take a ‘sacred pause’ to celebrate ourselves and our achievements.

Celebrating achievements

Since becoming a Coach for Mums, I’ve realised how important it is to celebrate our achievements, because:

• it gives you a confidence boost

• it increases your resilience

• and more often than not, you realise you’ve achieved way more than you thought

I encourage my coaching clients to celebrate their achievements and also try to do this myself too. Here’s a few of my posts where I’ve reflected on my achievements - from early May this year and from Sept 2023 too.

As I was reading about having this ‘sacred pause’, it got me thinking that I generally always think of the external achievements (like the ones I talk about in the above posts), which are linked to my work or being productive in some way.

For this sacred pause, I thought more about the internal achievements that relate to my personal growth and actually how far I’ve come as a mum, over the years.

In this week’s Motherhood and Creativity interview (which’ll be published this Sunday),

Rahma

talks about how she has learnt and grown as a mum alongside her kids and this ties in nicely with these internal achievements that I mention.

Coming back to myself, so I can come back to my kids

Here’s what came up for me when I reflected on what my internal achievements are:

• when I was deep in post-natal anxiety in 2018, I used to stay in with my kids a lot, because my anxiety consumed my thoughts and thought of every worst case scenario, so it was easier for me to stay in where I felt safer, but my world became smaller. Now, the sense of pride and achievement I feel when I’ve got all 3 kids out of the house by myself, and we are having a day out, and I stop for a moment and look at my kids and I tell them how much I enjoy their company. Moments like that are pretty much the best feeling, when I feel proud of myself and just happy to be with my kids.

• when I thought that to be a good mum, that meant completely abandoning myself and my wants and needs, so that’s what I did as a new mum for about 3 years. Now, I actively find tiny moments throughout my day to focus on me which calm, ground and soothe me. I hope that I’m modelling to my kids too that my wants and needs are important too so that they’ll remember this when they enter parenthood.

• when bedtimes used to be extremely stressful and every night I used to be consumed with shame in how I’d shouted and gotten angry. Now, I’m able to catch those thoughts and give myself self-compassion instead, and I realise that it’s OK to find situations hard as a mum. We find them hard because they are hard. Being kinder to myself means that I can be calmer in the moment too, not always, but definitely more than I used to be able to.

I think that all of these internal achievements are really all about coming home to myself, and the more I’ve come back to myself, the more I seem to be able to come back to my kids.

Always learning and growing

I’ve realised that I’ll always be learning and growing as a mum and I’ll never have it all figured out - how can I? My 3 kids are constantly changing - their wants, their needs and their personalities, and I’m changing too. Just knowing this makes me feel like the pressure is off, because the end goal isn’t about mastering motherhood as a skill.

Instead, nearly 10 years into motherhood, I’m thinking that motherhood is all about navigating an ever-changing family life, building up our coping skills to be able to weather these changes, and giving ourselves and each other kindness and grace along the way. What do you think?

Join me in the comments and let me know:

• What internal achievements do you want to celebrate today?

• What do these achievements mean to you?

Summer holiday overwhelm - a free mini workshop for you

If you are finding the summer holidays tough, then check out my free mini workshop on how to ease your overwhelm over the summer holidays here.

Ways to work with me over the summer

☀️Rediscover YOU - 1 to 1 coaching

I’ve got capacity to coach 1 lovely mum, 1 to 1 over the summer.

Rediscover YOU is a 12 week 1 to 1 coaching experience where I’ll support you to:

• work out what’s important to you now in your current season of motherhood

• how you can make positive changes in your life in line with these priorities, in a totally do-able way as a busy mum.

Over 12 weeks, there’ll be 6 x one hour coaching calls with me, mindfulness meditations, as well as a 12 week bespoke self-care plan that complements the coaching.

You can find all the details here and you can book in for a free 30 min chat with me, to chat more about how I can support you.

☀️Bespoke Self-Care Plan for Mums

I’ve also got space for 1 mum to start their Bespoke Self-Care Plan for Mums with me over the summer where I’ll support you to swap overwhelm, mum-guilt and anger for calm and compassion by building up tiny moments of daily self-care over 12 weeks.

The Bespoke Self-Care Plan for Mums will change the way that you see and practice self-care forever by using a combination of:

• a comprehensive 12 week bespoke self-care plan designed especially for you (jam packed with over 75 self-care ideas)

• twice weekly Whatsapp accountability from me as a Coach for Mums, for extra motivation and encouragement

• a bonus especially for you – the 14 Days of Journalling Prompts for Mums E-Book

The Bespoke Self-Care Plan is £100 for the full 12 weeks and you can find all of the details here.