With joy, comes hope

The first post of my monthly series 'The Remembering'

This is the first post of my monthly series called ‘The Remembering’.

This monthly series will be all about remembering yourself. Not who you are as a mum, or a wife, a partner, a daughter, a sister, a friend or a colleague.

You.

In this monthly series, using my experience as a Coach for Mums, I’ll be supporting you to remember who you are and to take action on this, in a totally sustainable way as a mum.

In this first post, I’m going to be focusing on how tiny moments of joy can help you figure out what’s important to you and how they can give you hope too.

I hope that you find this monthly series uplifting, empowering and that it’s a way to help you find your way back to who you always have been.

Photo by Leo Chane on Unsplash

A moment of joy

It’s 9pm and I’m writing this sitting on the floor in my son’s bedroom, with a blanket wrapped around my shoulders. I’m relishing the quietness and calm now that all 3 of my kids are asleep.

This right here, this is a moment of joy.

The peace. Writing down my thoughts. Crafting them all together so that they hopefully encourage and inspire you.

And it’s moments of joy that I want to talk about today.

How do moments of joy help you remember who you are?

I think that part of remembering who you are as a mum, is remembering what brings you joy and tapping into that joy.

Joy is available to us in tiny fleeting moments throughout our day. Even in the most mundane of days and the most stressful of days, there will be moments of joy.

When you actively seek out and notice these joyful moments, it helps you by instantly lifting your mood and it also grounds you in the present moment.

The beauty of it is, when you start to notice these tiny moments of joy, more will appear, because you are more attuned to them.

There’s also so much insight you can get when you reflect on those moments that are bringing you joy. You get to know what’s important to you and what lights you up.

You can then build on these tiny moments, so that you are actively looking for joyful experiences. These experiences might involve trying out something completely new, taking up some long forgotten hobbies, doing what soothes you, or doing something just for the fun of it.

With joy, comes hope

A really easy way of bringing tiny moments of joy into your life, is to notice the seasons when you are out and about - for me I usually do this when we are walking to school - it definitely helps me offset the stress around rushing everyone to school in the morning.

As we are slowly heading into Spring, it’s a great time to notice all of the things that mark a change in the seasons.

Maybe it’s the bright yellow daffodils swaying in the wind that bring with them the hope and promise of lighter and warmer days. They feel like a burst of sunshine on a cold and rainy day.

Or what about noticing the beginnings of the blossom on the trees - when there’s more buds than blossom. I think there’s something just as beautiful about this as there is when it’s in full bloom. A reminder that we can bloom when we are ready. At our own pace.

When you notice joy, it makes you feel hopeful too, hopeful that things can change.

And we all need a little more joy and hope in our lives, don’t we?

Let’s start small

You might be thinking, well what is noticing a few moments of joy going to help me with? Surely those moments are too small to have any kind of benefit?

There’s one thing I know about making changes as a mum, and that’s that starting small is the best way to make a sustainable change. Well any change really, I’ve found. Taking those small steps is more likely to fit in with everything else you’ve already got going on in your busy life as a mum.

It’s in the noticing and focusing on you that’s important too. Shifting away, just for a short while, into how you feel and what matters to you is just the start.

It’s laying the groundwork for what’s to come and getting you used to focusing on you for short amounts of time, in a way that fits into your life.

What if joy feels completely out of reach for you?

I know what it’s like for joy to seem so far away.

When you feel so overwhelmed with the weight of the responsibilities of motherhood that you are just not in the head-space to even think about what will bring you joy.

I do know that grounding yourself in the present moment even for just a few seconds, it takes you away from the overwhelm. The tiny moments of noticing joy all add up and make a difference.

How do I know?

Because this is exactly where I started when I was deep in my postnatal anxiety 6 years ago, when my daughter was 3 and my middle son was 6 months old. And I thought at the time, how are these small moments going to help me feel better?

But they did, bit by bit and it’s something I’ve carried on ever since then, so it’s easier for me now to notice those moments of joy and sink into them, even just for a few seconds.

I had a year of therapy too, so I’m not saying noticing tiny moments of joy fixed my post-natal anxiety alone, but what I am saying is that these moments definitely helped.

Most importantly, these tiny moments helped me access a positive emotion, when at the time, my days were mostly spent feeling completely numb.

You can listen to more about my motherhood story in this podcast episode.

Some things that have brought me joy recently

• Noticing the small pops of colour in nature from winter berries - like holly bushes and rosehips too (I blatantly checked this link for what kind of winter berries I meant!)

• Watching my two eldest kids walk ahead of me while I’m pushing the pram with my youngest in, and mentally freeze framing that moment (obviously these are the short periods of time when they are not bickering!)

• Looking forward to reading a good book on my Kindle while I’m cuddling my youngest to sleep (adored this new release from Tia Williams)

• The winter sun streaming through the blinds as I’m writing this

• My kids shrieking with laughter this morning as they all tried to splash me by jumping in puddles at the park

I think when we focus on noticing those tiny moments, and then reflect on them, what really matters to us and what lights us up becomes clearer.

It’s often the simpler things that actually matter to us, not the big things.

For more inspiration on those tiny joyful moments, I love the weekly ‘Everyday Magic’ note from

Charlene Storey

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I hope that this post has inspired you to notice those small moments of joy, so you can bring the things you love and enjoy, back into your days.

Here’s to more joy amongst the chaos!

Thank you so much for reading - I really appreciate each and every subscriber and every comment, share and re-stack from you.

I’d love to know in the comments:

• What tiny moments of joy have you noticed recently? Share photos if you have them!

• On reflection, what do these small moments of joy tell you about what’s important to you?